A letter to my darling children at the end of another year.

To my precious babies

I’ve been meaning to write this letter for some time now, and I have such a lot to say. This year has been trying for all of us, for many different reasons, but we made it through and I am proud of all of you. It’s been an extremely busy year, and often I am sure you have felt we have been like ships in the night. I know there have been a few times I have felt this way, and feared you were feeling alone or rejected by me. I made an extra effort to try to connect with you in ways out of the ordinary whenever I felt this way, but only hope it was enough, and that I didn’t let you down.

There were some things that really stood out to me this year, that you achieved, overcame, understood or did, and I want to tell you that you have made me prouder with every one of them. I burst at the seams with pride, each time one of you have learnt something new, figured something out for yourself or dealt with a different or hard situation.  You all persevered and made it out the other end with little more than a few words of encouragement and guidance from me.  You are all strong and your self will is only spurred on by your utter desire to be the best you can.

Kids together

You were all so creative this year with lovely cards, poems, stories and pictures.  Each and every one so very special to me.You worked so hard at school and excelled in your sports and extra mural activities.  You learned to say sorry and to respect your peers. You opened your hearts to people less fortunate that yourselves, and you have all lightened up our home with funny new jokes, lovely songs you have learned. I love hearing them over and over.  It makes me happy because it reminds me to be thankful for you every minute.

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This year you also had to learn to deal with new emotions, you learnt about new words with scary meanings like Terrorism and Suicide bombings. These were hard pills to swallow, but you seem to have understood, and have great empathy for those that are directly affected by it all, but at the same time you feel great sadness because this perfect world you thought you lived in, has started to crash around you and it’s very scary for you. Well done on being brave. You had to learn to deal with the sad reality of unexpected death, when your school principal lost his son in a tragic car accident and it affected the whole community.

You made a card and flowers with such love and thought, and went to lay it down at the memorial, you didn’t even know this young man yet you felt a deep connection and sadness for the grieving family and especially father whom you look up to so much.  I am so proud of you for being so genuinely able to feel sympathy for someone hurting so much. Not too long ago your little budgie died and you were all so devastated. I was so inspired by you when you arranged his little funeral on your own and all threw petals into his grave and wished him well on his journey. You are such special children.

Kids netball

I want to thank you for being such troopers in keeping our new-found family traditions going strong.  We decided as a family to start two weekend traditions, and sometimes I am not motivated to follow through each weekend, but you make your love for them known by making sure I don’t forget, and each time I make the Sunday Pancake batter and toss the first pancake I am glad I did and smile knowing we have something unique to us.  It’s because of you, you make it what it is.

Kids braaing

I am bowled over with pride and happiness when I think about your incredible school concert performances, your dedication and excitement in the preparation and running up to the night.  How you shone on stage and lived in the moment. I cried buckets and buckets of tears of joy and pride. I cried them again last night at the grade R graduation where you were so good in your percussion orchestra piece my boy and when they asked what you want to be when you grow up and you said emphatically “A Vet”. You were beautiful. Well done! There were some moments when you had to be really brave like when you knocked your front teeth almost clean out my boy or when you slashed your chin open on the floor my baby girl or when the hockey stick slammed into your shin the one day you forgot to put on your shin guard my big girl.  You were all so brave and I am really proud of you.

Zoe concert

You showed me a perseverance and undeniable faith this year that I wish I had myself.  Like when we were longing for a new puppy and your Daddy said it would have to wait.  You played pretend games and visualized having one for months and it paid off with the arrival of our new little baby Milo this past weekend.  You are all Rock-stars for being patient and believing that time would come.

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I am grateful for every loving heart-felt wish you made to me during this year, for my Birthday, for Easter, Mothers day and all the times in between.  Every breakfast and card or flower you brought me.  I loved them all and treasure the memories forever in my heart.

My wish for my relationship with you all, is that it will grow increasingly and continue to do so daily.  I wish for us to be just as we are now. Together, happy and full of joy.  You are all my stars and I love you.

This is an unrehearsed life my children and you live it beautifully.

Lots of love

Mommy

 

 

 

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