Is age only a number? Well before I turned forty, heck even when I had turned forty that is exactly what I thought. Since I am now forty plus one year I have come to the stark realization that actually age is exactly that, it is age and boy it can hit you square in the middle of your forehead and make you feel ancient, even before you are 42.
So how do you get yourself out of that way of thinking? Well, there is really only one thing you can do and that is to accept it and move on. It is to be celebrated, not denied.
I thought I would share a few sentiments and thoughts, on why I think forty shouldn’t be considered a dirty word like the world makes you think it is, and why all of us beautiful middle-aged women need to accept that is has to happen, and take the bull by the horns and just move on and make the most of it. We aren’t dead yet right?
So even if you are not yet forty listen up, what I am about to tell you should not be a secret, this is something we all need to embrace and be open to. There is simply no other way around it. When I was a young girl, I think in primary school, my parents were busy turning forty and I thought it was ancient, it stuck with me, and as society would have it women in their middle years are often portrayed to be getting on and with nothing much left to give in the way of health, beauty, style and expertise. This is often brought on by the onslaught of media making an asserted point of making us ladies feel super ancient all the time. Past our prime or so they would have us think.
As a blogger, I have found this particularly difficult to deal with during the last year, and that is why I have been away from the blog. I have just felt that I had no relevance. Nobody wants to hear the things that I am wanting to talk about because they just made me sound old. According to mainstream thought, aging is taboo. Well, it is not at all true. We can all age gracefully and have fun doing it and we should talk about it. We often take ourselves far too seriously and that my darlings, is something that has to change. Onwards and upwards I say.
So if you are struggling with hitting your middle aged years and starting to experience some things that maybe make you feel like you are going mad then stick around. Below I am going to tell you about three small things that you can do to help you win. Listen, it isn’t everything but these are things that can make a difference and are a start to help you cope with all the changes that will start developing from here on in.
Change your mindset
It all starts with you lady. Yes, you heard me. If you are going to sit back and think that it’s over, you have nothing left to offer well then that’s your problem. I know that’s not true though, and I really do hope you will see that with all your experience (I.e the life you have already lived) and the fact that you are still the amazing, vibrant, vivacious, exciting women you were before you hit your forties and you still have tonnes to give and are very relevant.
Except for cartwheels, no forty-year-old woman unless they have been doing yoga every day for the last 10 years has any business doing cartwheels. Trust me, I have tried, you will regret it and all you will end up getting as your trophy is stretched ligaments and muscles in places you didn’t think you had any. Ibuprofen will be required. Worse when you have done it after a glass or two of wine.
Make friends with your bodily changes.
This is a biggie, and probably the one I have been struggling with the most. It’s almost like the day I turned forty new unsightly and unwanted facial hair started appearing and my skin completely turned into something totally unknown to me. Adult acne is a thing ya’ll. Somehow my body has decided I am back in my teenage years. I don’t have gray hairs yet but my hair is definitely thinning and quite noticeably at the crown. Then let’s move down to that middle area why don’t we. The term “Middle-aged spread” springs to mind. Getting rid of it is not the same as getting rid of unwanted belly fat in your 20’s. It’s downright impossible unless you eat absolutely no refined foods or sugar and follow a serious exercise regime and then still it’s hard to get rid of. Now I don’t know about you, but between everything else I just can’t actively follow major diets, I just don’t have the time. I also really struggle to find the time for exercise. I am all gung-ho when I start but it slowly fizzles out when I realize I just can’t fit it all in with my busy work and family life. Therefore I have come to the realization that you must do what you can when you can. Make good choices and perhaps take the dog for two extra walks during the week or make that Sunday walk with the family just a little longer or more challenging. Then wear Spanx, Spanx is your friend or any other decent shapewear really. Bridget Jones gave the idea of shapewear a really bad rap in the movie and I promise you, there are some really gorgeous pairs to choose from. They are not granny panties. They come is some super new styles and really will save you on those days when the bloating is extra bad.
Be educated, as you age things will start changing, yes you have to start thinking about things like some massive physical and emotional changes and just like when you were in your baby making years, and getting all educated about how to get yourself impregnated and then birthing your bundle of joy, you need to educate yourself about what to expect when you start going through your next physical phase and that is the all massive taboo subject of menopause.
Say it out loud now MEN-O-PAUSE! It’s not a dirty word. I was shocked to discover after periods of feeling very unlike myself, struggling emotionally, hormonally and experience a few other symptoms that at the age of 42 I am already in the first phase of Peri-Menopause. Yikes, I said it out loud.
Well, I needed to find out what this meant for me. I needed to educate myself and I did and now I am going to share a great resource with you. It comes in the form of the ever entertaining YouTube Channel by Dr. Barbara Taylor aka Menopause Barbie. It sounds weird and quirky and she certainly on the offset seems weird and cooky but go and have a look anyway. She knows her stuff and is all degreed and published to prove it. She has a course you can follow based on a very popular book that she wrote and she tells you things you are never going to learn from any other healthcare practitioner or just people in general. I have learned so much and figured out such a lot about what I am going through. She is also amazing responsive if you comment on her channel.
So, for now, I will stop there. Take it all in. Think about it. It really doesn’t have to be that bad. Yes, it is challenging and takes a whole lot of getting used to, but I am here to tell you that I am going to do my level best to be with you all the way and perhaps we can beat the forties together. I am really hoping that I will be able to build a sort of support community here through my blog and I would love to hear from you. Let me know in comments what your thoughts are on aging and anything that I have mentioned above. I am excited to be on this journey with you.
You may have noticed that I have created two new hashtags for the blog and all my social media, in the hopes that this community can grow and feel more connected. If you liked what you have read here then please share this post using the social media sharing function below and use any or both of my new tags @BeingMeBlog and #40IsNotADirtyWord
P.s I am not affiliated to any of the above-mentioned products or services.